So, how long should you wait for him to commit? A lot of people are determined to change over the short term but go right back to what they were doing over the long term. I have tried the whole dating thing once when we broke up briefly in the past and that is what made me realize that I truly wanted to be with him for the rest of my life and no one else. I feel that our relationship is stronger them the average couple because we have overcame deployments being apart from each other and we have grown stronger. I had the benefit of knowing it could happen. You should be able to work through your issues together.
If you see too many red flags, you get out. Maybe time isn't an issue; maybe you're too young. What do these timelines mean for you still waiting for your man to propose? When he plead guitly, I turned in a fraternization form they have a fraternization policy stating that employees have to have permission to be involved with anyone under the supervision of the Department of Corrections. The more often we feel the latter, the more likely we are to fall in love. Especially if the two of you are in what you believe to be a serious or heading that way relationship. Don't blame love for your indiscretions.
Yes, that is partly due to the difference in how the laws treat tobacco vs other drugs. Then we would have dated four years before marriage which I feel is great we will both have finished college and survived almost his first contract with the Marines which is what we actually planned in the beginning. Good luck, and keep us posted! Instead, she waits to see if he has what it takes as a man to get a woman back after a break up. I suppose it is a bit. Do you stick with him if he gets out and uses drugs again? Focus on picking up the pieces and spend a lot of time just you and the kid. Confusion and ambivalence are human traits, not just male ones. Even the fantasy of it disappeared the minute you found out the truth about your boyfriend.
I'm asking you not to call it quits after years of happiness because you had a single moment of sadness or anger. The reason it escalated was because of him. I had to think logically to make my decision though. If she waits she will have even more of her life invested into him and that will make leaving even tougher. As you say, it is a very long and lonely process. He could have sought treatment at this point, but he chose not to. We must stop judging and blaming ourselves for needing what we need.
More objectivity will help open your intuition to come through. There are important things to think about before you let emotion in. It is time to focus on your son and how you are going to support him alone. They sell to mentally handicapped people. If he doesn't know what you prefer, you may end up waiting longer than you'd like. Until you really understand all that, you'll always have a few questions: What if? These cases are less common, but it surprises me that some guys wait that long to contact their ex and begin the ex back process. I only want to be with her.
Think about if you are willing to put in that work as well. I've been with my Marine for two years now. This is seeking treatment under duress, not voluntarily. Step up and start making better decisions on his behalf. I know that your situation absolutely sucks. My boyfriend and our son and I stayed together.
So this morning I replied with a text telling him I appreciated his apology but there was no reason to talk to me like that or be mean to me and hurtful. I do not believe that illegal activities immediately make you a bad person. If you want something long term, you should be looking for a guy who wants the same thing. With that being said, if you've found someone to love, then you'd better figure out a way to make time for that person. I am staying with him though.
I was already sad about something so this just made it worst. People break up for painful reasons all the time. Do you spend special occasions, holidays, and important events together? Ashley Davene, Relationship Counselor - Copyright Notice You may not, except with express written permission, distribute or commercially exploit the content. When you interact with her in ways that spark her feelings, everything changes. On one side write the question, what does commitment look like to me? I think it come down to was he innocent or was his offense forgivable? They ran it over four years ago but i remember it clearly mainly because I was so horrified by it. Once you have thought through the details logically, then you can bring in emotion and see how that effects things.
She was only in jail for a year, but he stayed with her. But as long as you explain that it doesn't mean that you never will love him or her, things will be okay. These are the things to look for to decide how long to stick around. At the end of it all I felt even worse due to how he was acting and the things he said. Some days I do regret it and some days are more of a challenge than others, but I am so fortunate to have a loving family and great friends. An addict is an addict for life and this man has a long way to go to get out of jail, get clean, and to make amends for royally screwing up the lives of four people, three of whom are his innocent children. So please try to keep your head up.
It damaged their lives considerably. And for all we know, he could be innocent. Though after almost a year his career was really stressing him and he changed some. With grief and divorce most people wish we could just follow a structured timeline and be done with the process. Once you've come up with a number of years or, gulp, months I think it's fair to present the timeline to your boyfriend. If you're in love, you want to let the other person know.